A question that has already been answered officially…gets an unofficial answer.
While any long-time fan of ¡MAYDAY! knows that the band has always had a pretty fluid roster with members coming and going as their lifestyles allow, the main question for the group over the past couple albums/tours has been “Where’s Plex”?
The question has been asked so much that not only was it addressed in the ¡MURSDAY! track “Spiked Punch”, but there’s an entire skit dedicated to the bearded mystery man’s absence at the end of “Fuel To The Fire” off the new album Future Vintage.
Add to that the fact that the ¡MAYDAY! fellas recently spoke on the subject outright in an interview with AllHipHop, and you’d think the question was pretty much answered as well as it could possibly be, right?
…Wrong. We came up with a few potential explanations (and some really, really shitty photoshopped evidence) about Plex’s whereabouts that the ¡MAYDAY! guys might be trying to cover up. Check these out and form your own decision:
Plex is re-constructing the lost city of Atlantis in the Hall Of Records, deep beneath the Great Sphinx of Giza
It’s no secret that Plex is a natural-born truth seeker, and has an ever-growing knowledge of math and science which aid in his constant ponderings of life and it’s limitless wonders.
With that in mind, we would not be at all surprised if Plex has indeed found the mythical hall of records, a chamber of secrets of sorts hidden deep beneath the great sphinx of Giza that holds all the answers on the fabled lost city of Atlantis.
Is Plex currently math-ing away underneath a giant stone cat/person/thing, rebuilding the greatest society history has ever maybe known?
The simple answer: maybe.
Plex is working as a janitor at MIT, anonymously solving complex math equations after hours and dodging his inner demons
We’ve already established that Plex is somewhat of a brainiac, so this should come as no surprise.
It is entirely possible that Plex has taken up a job as a janitor at the prestigious Massachusetts Institute of Technology, where he sneaks into the math department at night and solves incredibly complex equations that leave teachers and students alike baffled the next day, all the while embroiled in his own personal troubles with childhood bullies, women, and his own startling intelligence.
If this has you worried, never fear, for a patient and similarly genius psychotherapist will clearly help Plex conquer his demons and help him learn to fight to regain the love of his life.
Also, something about apples.
Plex is deep in an underground bunker, performing programming duties for Anonymous
If you follow ¡MAYDAY!’s official Facebook page, you know that not only is Plex a super intelligent dude, but he’s also got some very strong moral opinions about what’s going on in the world.
This leads us to believe that the reason Plex has lessened his role in the group is because he’s joined another group: Anonymous.
Plex’s recent interest in computer and app programming, paired with his desire to do good in the world, makes him the perfect candidate to be a bearded guardian for the now-legendary hactivist group.
He is legion. He does not forgive. He does not forget. Plexpect him.
Plex is on a small, secluded island off the coast of Aruba, teaching Tupac Shakur quantum physics
If Tupac is actually still alive, this is really the only scenario that makes sense.
While the rest of the world has continuously mourned the loss of one of the most influential rapper/poet/activists of our lifetime, Plex wasn’t satisfied with the story we all received.
After decoding a secret morse code message (get it? right?), Plex discovered longitude and latitude coordinates that led him to a remote island off the coast of Aruba where he actually discovered that Tupac is still alive!
Becoming friends immediately, Plex began to school Tupac on the ways of quantum physics, in hopes that they could develop a time travel machine that would allow ¡MAYDAY! to travel back to early-90s California to join Tupac, creating the ultimate hip hop supergroup.
Seeing as how our current timeline has not been altered (to our knowledge) yet, we’ll have to assume that they’re still in the middle of their studies.
Plex is working as a strategic aide to Sasquatch
So that’s why we’ve never captured him.
While conspiracy theorists and crazy hunters have made multiple claims of spotting or even capturing the elusive bigfoot, Plex has been helping the furry dude narrowly escape the grips of greedy human hands for the past couple years.
Not only does Plex use algorithms to determine safe travel routes for the sought-after creature, he also occasionally covers his body in fur and runs diversion missions, backtracking and leading reality TV hunters on wild goose chases…all while punching anyone that denies him Jack Links beef jerky (not a plug, buy any kind of jerky you want).
- What did you think of our explanations?
- Should we stop letting Brent get high and play with photoshop?
- Are you hyped for Future Vintage?
Get at us in the comments section below!