Good try dude.... Get better audio recording (mic and program) work on you're mastering you got a flow even though the punches are kind of weak buuuuut! flow is the hardest thing to master so you're starting with the right foot, stray from the music videos unless someone is really known for them
I thought u did pretty good man,.yea it could use a little work, but that shit was better than most people put up on this site. I like the fact that you switched it up too and didn't just stick to the chopper flow. u defintely need a better intro right b4 u start bustin but other than that it's not bad..